Tyson

When your ment to have a being in your life, your body is made with a little crevasse just for them .
When I say little, to our physical bodies, it is little. But to our souls this hole is big enough for the whole being to crawl into and be safe when they are hurt. It’s the place for us put them, to protect them from the world.
When it is time for that being leave. When that being’s soul is ready to return to its real home, it leaves the home you’ve made for them empty.
Now you have this hole.
This dark empty hole, that to your body is so small.
But to your soul you are missing a piece of you. This empty hole becoming big enough for you, yourself to fall into.
When you have a hole inside of your being, ment for a being who’s ment to forever be a part of you, and that being falls away to a place without you, what is there for you to do?
You can’t fill this gaping hole, you can’t bring them back, your memory of them is fading away by the second, and all you want to do is to be woven into the collar that they used to wear.
When your ment to have a being in your life, your sometimes ment to loose them too.
That deep dark hole was created for you to always have that being with you. Even if that crevasse is forever empty
It was created to hold them. Just for you and just for them.

I have been conquered by today,
And it seems that had to be that way.
I had to once again see
That life is not about me.
For the past three days,
My heads been stuck in a cold maze.
Filled with coughs, and sniffles, and tissues like never before,
Making me feel like I cannot take any more.
But as I sat in my car, about to get angry a red light,
An idea hit me, like the lights on the car across the street from me, shining bright.
What am I doing wasting my time,
Instead of being so angry I could be sitting in the rain trying to rhyme.
I was told today that the rain is to continue for the next three days,
That thought alone leaving me in a contradictory haze.
I need to get better,
But that’s impossible if I continue to go out into the rain without a sweater.
For in my heart the rain always prevails,
Simply because the gloomy weather is perfect to tell my tales.
So grasping the last three days of this storm,
Continually writing will keep me mentally, and physically warm.
Cheers to the rain,
For keeping me sain.
For dulling my hearts pain,
And never letting my writing be in vain.

Normally I like to think that I am quite good at embracing change,
But it seems as tho, right now my tires are skidding at the sight of how my life has rearranged.
With the loss of the closest furry friends I’ve ever had in this life,
I’m wandering around trying to rid my heart its mourning knife.
This feeling of being alone,
Seeps in the deepest when I am at home.
Making it the rarest feeling I’ve ever known.
I can feel the tides changing, the past three weeks providing many examples
From losses, and friends moving, even the objective of my wander, the biggest change being how my heart pulls.
I’m a creature of happiness, or at least I was, before this flip,
But now, day by day I have to forcefully catch myself from letting my emotions slip.
With 75% of me wanting to be consumed by the darkness, the last 25% Just can’t stand the thought of being swallowed.
Waking up and being joyous is becoming quite the load.
In this strange new world I’ve found, event the flowers are growing upsidedown.
In this gloomy state of being,
As much as I hate it, it’s only negitivity I’m seeing.

With a thumpity thump, my heart slows stilling and trapping the chills inside my bones.
Leaving my body echoing with gut wrenching tones.
I so badly just want to stay here, and let my all wash to shore,
Only the miniscule bit of optimism left wont let me, it says I must fight this war.
Shine bright like the sun,
Give that darkness a reason to run.
I won’t let this sadness swallow me whole,
It just so happens that right now, sadness is my role.
I’m lost in this mess of a flux,
The fact that I asked for it, the crux.

A not so desperate plea for companionship

my reflection I see beauty.

Beauty working hard to consume my whole.

Is that its role?

In my reflecton can you see my mind?

Or even that I am half blind?

What do I portray?

I do hope its as bright as a sun ray.

An individualistic intelligence, stuck in a state of trance.

Its deep down there, In

striking when Im low, hurting me everywhere.

Loneliness ruins.

But not a soul shall tell.

An emotional state in hell.

This fear of feeling far to deeply,

used to living far to freely.

Ill walk through life holding my own hand.

Im far to independent to depend.

 But still, Its true, I need a friend.

Some one who will talk, of love, of moral, of books,

even sometimes remove me from hooks.

We’ll be independently dependent with a friendship of security.

You hear me rendering,

 be the song.

I want you to see, I am.

A girl from a different land.

Music boiling in my blood,

 I could write you a song,

as long as, you wouldn’t find it wrong.

Its a infinite friendship that I long.

FOR

Great passion, more given then ever to receive .

Trust, something to believe.

Independency, within our minds, dependency is nothing to achieve.

Im not going to beg,

I know you’ll come.

That night we’ll celebrate with rum.

 In the mean time I’ll continue to think,

always telling myself Im on the brink.

A young blonde girl, lost in a whirl. Waiting for the friend,

who will be with her till the end.